THE GOOGLY: CHRIS WOAKES IS NOW ‘OVERCOOKED'... FOR REAL?

"Past Ashes stories are full of such propaganda"

Britain has woken up this morning to the worrying story that Chris Woakes may be ‘overcooked’.

Yes, you read that right, in an exciting twist from England cricketers being ‘undercooked’ at the start of modern tours, there is a concern that the Warwickshire seamer has peaked too early.

He took 6 for 55 in the first innings against a mighty Cricket Australia XI, a ragtag troop served up by Cricket Australia. Bereft of any Sheffield Shield players, even the most deluded of souls does not believe this provides adequate preparation to face Australia in the first Test in front of 40,000 baying fans at The Gabba…

Woakes also took 2 for 48 and 4 for 17 against a Cricket Australia XI (again) at the Adelaide Oval.

Before that he did not manage a wicket against Western Australia XI at Perth. There were concerns that he was “undercooked”. A week is a long time in cricket.

Woakes has previous at being undercooked. He did not appear good enough on his debut against Australia at The Oval in 2013.

He came back from injury too quickly at Headingley against West Indies last summer.

Now I know a thing or two about overcooking. I am impatient, so when the packaging tells me to cook something at 190C I whack it up to 210C. My oven timer also does not work. Think Rory and Neil Burns…

I don’t think Woakes is overcooked, though. Taking wickets will have given him an enormous surge of confidence. I reckon he feels just right.

Undercooked, overcooked, past Ashes stories are full of such propaganda.

Alec Bedser just wanted a rest at the start of the 1946/47 trip. "We went by sea. It took three weeks in a Ministry of War transport carrier. There was no running round the decks on the journey. I had just bowled 1,200 overs in England so it was a nice rest."

Frank ‘Typhoon’ Tyson may have been underdone when he took 1 for 160 in the first Test of the 1954/55 series at Brisbane, but he was far too hot for the hosts from then on, taking 28 wickets at 20.82 in that 3-1 series win.

“Tyson was the quickest I have ever seen,” Tom Graveney said. “He had a 40mph gale behind him in that Test. When he came on I was standing 50 yards back at slip; I was closer to the fence than the stumps!” 

Mike Gatting’s England were thought to be like a chicken burger with frost in the middle ahead of the 1986/87 rubber. They lost to Queensland and almost to Western Australia, leading Martin Johnson to write: “There are only three things wrong with this England team – they can’t bat, can’t bowl and can’t field.”

Gladstone Small was on his first tour. “Gatt was very relaxed,” he told me. “As long as you performed he would give you a little leeway to enjoy yourself. We made an awful start, though: we were beaten by the pineapple growers of Queensland, the peanut farmers of Sydney and the wine growers of Adelaide. Thankfully it was proper touring in those days, so we had time to find our form. 

“The night before the Brisbane Test, Beefy, who had been culprit No 1, said, 'Right, the party is over’. We’d had our fun and games, now all the senior players came together.”

And how.

The tours under Duncan Fletcher were notorious for leaving England under-prepared, and that was the case on the 2002/03 and 2006/07 trips to down under.

England rectified that in 2010/11 under Andy Flower, however, with just the right amount of matches – two three-dayers against Western Australia and South Australia, and a four-dayer against Australia A.

As to this winter… wait until the Brisbane Test is well underway before concluding if England are raw or grilled.

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